There are many things I wish someone would have told me when I turned
18. As I shared in a previous post, I was given the opportunity to write
a young man a letter recently, passing any wisdom to this young man
that I thought would be appropriate. I did, but I felt that my letter
came up short. It did because it barely scratched the surface of what I
wish someone would have told me.
For this reason, I have written a letter…
I was honored to write you a letter this past week. However, thinking
back over what I said, I think I came up terribly short. As usual, I
could always blame the brevity of my note to the fact I am busy, that I
have a large family, or that my responsibilities with work were getting
the best of me. The problem is, if I said that, I’d be just like most
other men in America; making excuses for coming up short.
The truth is, I was more concerned with sounding good than saying
something good. Austin, I believe in you too much to simply tell you to
choose maturity throughout life. In the next few years, you will go
through such a shaping season of your life. I have watched good men make
decisions during this time that would alter their life dramatically.
That being said, here are a few points I want to pass along:
Po-rnography kills marriages.
because they were addicted to looking at naked women on computer
screens. They knew they hated looking at it, but sin’s web was tightly
constricting them. Remember that this isn’t just about keeping your eyes
pure. It is also about not setting your wife up to fail. What these
guys look at on computers is not real. It is a sick fantasy. The
producers of po-rn take air-brushed, plastic women, and have them act
like they have the s*x drive of men.
Men arrive in marriage with unreal expectations, and the damage done takes years to unravel.
Men need friends. You need good, solid guys that can lock arms
with you and walk life next to you. In college many guys start living
life “around” other guys, but never with them. Austin, find some guys
that want to honor God with their lives. Seek to know them, and allow
them to know you. As you get older, this becomes even more difficult, so
learn early how critical this really is.
God’s grace is deep.
while I was in college. Growing up, I didn’t have the slightest desire
to read books. Given the decision, I would have picked doing something
outside fun and active as opposed to reading. Yet, after I became a
Christian, this changed.
Take advantage of your college years to dive deep in God’s Word. Study
it. Reflect on it. Memorize it. Ask someone to teach it to you. Austin,
you are a good man, raised in a great family. Yet, you have so much to
learn about the depths of the riches of God’s love. Don’t miss this
Don’t focus so much on your grades that you miss an education.
my first conduct grades in 1st grade. It was all downhill from there.
As you go through college, studying hard and trying to excel is
important, but don’t put in on a throne it didn’t belong.
Take advantage of opportunities to “cut your teeth” leading. Go on
mission trips where you can learn that God doesn’t just speak English.
Look at other cultures to understand what real poverty looks like. When
you finish college, all these experiences will have shaped you.
Above all else.
This is a chapter title from the book Spiritual Leadership. In this
chapter, he talks about the need for leadership that is Spirit-led.
Austin, this world needs men who are under the authority of the Lord
Jesus. Be purposeful in stopping to place your heart under His. Great
leadership doesn’t come from “technique-ing” people. It comes from
wisdom and discernment that is God-given. So go to Him, and ask. He’ll
As I told you in my first letter, I believe in you, Austin. I look
forward to watching God’s shaping hand on your life. Come sit on my
porch anytime if you’d like to discuss this further.
Walk in great grace, and speak with great power (Acts 4:33).