Once
upon a time there was a little boy who was talented, creative, handsome, and
extremely bright. A natural leader. The kind of person everyone would normally
have wanted on their team or project. But he was also self-centered and had a
very bad temper. When he got angry, he usually said, and often did, some very
hurtful things. In fact, he seemed to have little regard for those around him.
Even friends. So, naturally, he had few. “But,” he told himself, “that just
shows how stupid most people are!”
upon a time there was a little boy who was talented, creative, handsome, and
extremely bright. A natural leader. The kind of person everyone would normally
have wanted on their team or project. But he was also self-centered and had a
very bad temper. When he got angry, he usually said, and often did, some very
hurtful things. In fact, he seemed to have little regard for those around him.
Even friends. So, naturally, he had few. “But,” he told himself, “that just
shows how stupid most people are!”
As
he grew, his parents became concerned about this personality flaw, and pondered
long and hard about what they should do. Finally, the father had an idea. And
he struck a bargain with his son. He gave him a bag of nails, and a BIG hammer.
“Whenever you lose your temper,” he told the boy, “I want you to really let it
out. Just take a nail and drive it into the oak boards of that old fence out
back. Hit that nail as hard as you can!”
he grew, his parents became concerned about this personality flaw, and pondered
long and hard about what they should do. Finally, the father had an idea. And
he struck a bargain with his son. He gave him a bag of nails, and a BIG hammer.
“Whenever you lose your temper,” he told the boy, “I want you to really let it
out. Just take a nail and drive it into the oak boards of that old fence out
back. Hit that nail as hard as you can!”
Of
course, those weathered oak boards in that old fence were almost as tough as
iron, and the hammer was mighty heavy, so it wasn’t nearly as easy as it first
sounded. Nevertheless, by the end of the first day, the boy had driven 37 nails
into the fence (That was one angry young man!). Gradually, over a
period of weeks, the number dwindled down. Holding his temper proved to be
easier than driving nails into the fence! Finally the day came when the boy
didn’t lose his temper at all. He felt mighty proud as he told his parents
about that accomplishment.
course, those weathered oak boards in that old fence were almost as tough as
iron, and the hammer was mighty heavy, so it wasn’t nearly as easy as it first
sounded. Nevertheless, by the end of the first day, the boy had driven 37 nails
into the fence (That was one angry young man!). Gradually, over a
period of weeks, the number dwindled down. Holding his temper proved to be
easier than driving nails into the fence! Finally the day came when the boy
didn’t lose his temper at all. He felt mighty proud as he told his parents
about that accomplishment.
“As
a sign of your success,” his father responded, “you get to PULL OUT one nail.
In fact, you can do that each day that you don’t lose your temper even once.”
a sign of your success,” his father responded, “you get to PULL OUT one nail.
In fact, you can do that each day that you don’t lose your temper even once.”
Well,
many weeks passed. Finally one day the young boy was able to report proudly
that all the nails were gone.
many weeks passed. Finally one day the young boy was able to report proudly
that all the nails were gone.
At
that point, the father asked his son to walk out back with him and take one
more good look at the fence. “You have done well, my son,” he said. “But
I want you to notice the holes that are left. No matter what happens from now
on, this fence will never be the same. Saying or doing hurtful things in anger
produces the same kind of result. There will always be a scar. It won’t matter
how many times you say you’re sorry, or how many years pass, the scar will
still be there. And a verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. People are much
more valuable than an old fence. They make us smile. They help us succeed. Some
will even become friends who share our joys, and support us through bad times.
And, if they trust us, they will also open their hearts to us. That means we
need to treat everyone with love and respect. We need to prevent as many of
those scars as we can.”
that point, the father asked his son to walk out back with him and take one
more good look at the fence. “You have done well, my son,” he said. “But
I want you to notice the holes that are left. No matter what happens from now
on, this fence will never be the same. Saying or doing hurtful things in anger
produces the same kind of result. There will always be a scar. It won’t matter
how many times you say you’re sorry, or how many years pass, the scar will
still be there. And a verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. People are much
more valuable than an old fence. They make us smile. They help us succeed. Some
will even become friends who share our joys, and support us through bad times.
And, if they trust us, they will also open their hearts to us. That means we
need to treat everyone with love and respect. We need to prevent as many of
those scars as we can.”
This is a lesson for us all. Everyone can get angry occasionally. The real test is what we DO with it.
If
we are wise, we will spend our time building bridges rather than barriers in
our relationships.Anger is a terrible partner in any relationship and the Bible rightly commands “Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools” Eccl. 7:9.
we are wise, we will spend our time building bridges rather than barriers in
our relationships.Anger is a terrible partner in any relationship and the Bible rightly commands “Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools” Eccl. 7:9.
Anonymous
